A Work of Heart: How Museums Can Strengthen Your Relationship by Daedelus Hoffman

It’s a Tuesday night in February. The dinner plates have been cleared, the glow of the TV remote feels uninspiring, and the winter chill outside makes staying in seem like the easy choice. You and your partner sit on the couch, scrolling through your phones, each lost in your own little world. Another quiet evening, another missed opportunity to connect.

Now, imagine this instead: The two of you wander into a softly lit gallery at the Academy Art Museum. A striking painting catches your eye—bold, unfamiliar, something about it stirs you. You turn to your partner and ask, “What do you see?” They hesitate, then offer an answer that surprises you. You hadn’t thought of it that way. The conversation unfolds, ideas are exchanged, and suddenly, you’re learning something new—not just about the art, but about each other.

The idea that museums can strengthen relationships isn’t just anecdotal—it’s backed by science. Engaging with art in a shared space has been shown to increase intimacy, communication, and even attraction between partners. A study published in Museum Management and Curatorship found that couples who participated in cultural activities together, such as visiting a museum, reported a greater sense of closeness and relationship satisfaction than those who did not. Another report in The Journal of Positive Psychology revealed that engaging in novel and intellectually stimulating experiences with a partner enhances overall relationship quality by promoting shared meaning and increasing emotional bonds.

There’s a well-documented psychological phenomenon known as the “novelty effect”—when couples engage in new and stimulating activities, their brains release dopamine, the same neurotransmitter responsible for feelings of love and attraction. Studies have found that couples who experience novelty together—whether through travel, trying new activities, or engaging in cultural events—report higher levels of relationship satisfaction than those who fall into predictable routines.

Research from the University of California, Berkeley, suggests that shared aesthetic experiences, such as looking at art together, enhance emotional synchrony. This means that when couples observe and discuss artwork, their emotional responses align, deepening their sense of connection. Another study, published in Social and Personality Psychology Compass, found that mutual engagement with artistic and cultural activities fosters a sense of unity, reducing stress and promoting feelings of well-being.

Moreover, art has been shown to activate areas of the brain linked to pleasure and reward. A 2011 study in Brain and Cognition demonstrated that viewing art stimulates the same neural pathways as love and desire, making a museum visit a surprisingly potent tool for rekindling passion.

If you’re looking for a way to break free from the monotony of daily life and bring fresh energy into your relationship, here are a few ways to make the Academy Art Museum part of your next date night:

Walk Through an Exhibition Together

Museums provide a perfect environment for slow, thoughtful conversation—an antidote to the digital distractions that often interrupt our daily interactions. Unlike watching a film, where the experience is passive, engaging with an art exhibition encourages discussion. A study in Psychology of Aesthetics, Creativity, and the Arts found that sharing interpretations of artwork fosters intellectual intimacy and helps couples appreciate each other’s perspectives. Next time you visit an exhibition, challenge yourselves to find a piece you both love—or one you completely disagree on—and talk about why.

Experience Live Music at the Museum

Live music is uniquely powerful in creating emotional bonds. A 2017 study published in Frontiers in Psychology found that shared musical experiences enhance empathy and social bonding. The recent Roaring Rhythms jazz concert at the museum was a perfect example—couples swayed to the music, exchanged knowing smiles, and found themselves caught up in the shared experience of melody and rhythm. Attending a live performance together creates lasting sensory memories that become part of a couple’s shared history.

Catch a Film at the Museum’s New Film Series

Film screenings at the museum offer more than just a night out—they provide a structured yet intimate way to engage with storytelling together. A study in The Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that couples who watch and discuss films that explore relationship dynamics report better conflict resolution skills and deeper emotional understanding of their partners. Whether it’s an art-house film, a classic, or a contemporary drama, watching and discussing a movie together allows couples to reflect on themes that resonate with their own experiences.

Share a Love for Literature at a ShoreLit Book Talk

Books open up entire worlds, and discussing them with a partner can reveal surprising insights about each other. The Journal of Applied Social Psychology reports that engaging in literary discussions strengthens cognitive empathy—the ability to understand and share another’s emotions. The museum’s ShoreLit book talks introduce fresh voices in literature, giving you the chance to discover new ideas together. Whether you agree or disagree on an author’s perspective, the conversation will bring depth to your interactions

Get Creative Together in a Studio Class

Creative collaboration is one of the most effective ways to strengthen a relationship. A landmark study in The Creativity Research Journal found that couples who engage in artistic activities together report higher levels of relationship satisfaction, largely due to the cooperative problem-solving and emotional expression required in creative tasks. Taking an art class at the museum—whether it’s painting, pottery, or printmaking—provides a fun, low-pressure environment to experiment, make mistakes, and support each other. It’s about the process, not the product—and about creating something together, both literally and metaphorically.

Flowers wilt, chocolates disappear, but a shared experience at the Academy Art Museum? That’s something you’ll carry with you. This February, instead of the usual dinner-and-a-movie routine, consider a date night that deepens your connection in ways both scientifically proven and emotionally felt. Whether it’s standing side by side in front of a breathtaking painting, hearing live music together, or getting your hands messy in a ceramics class, museums provide an unparalleled setting for meaningful interaction.

After all, love is an art. And like any masterpiece, it needs time, attention, and the right environment to flourish.

Daedelus Hoffman is the director of education and interpretation at the Academy Art Museum. 

Looking for a creative way to spend time with your partner this month? Visit the Academy Art Museum and explore our exhibitions, events, and studio classes at academyartmuseum.org.