“He’s me.” The day new mentor David Bowen met eight-year-old Connor Skinner, he instantly recognized himself in the boy. “He’s me. He’s just like I was,” he said.
Bowen was matched with his own mentor through the Talbot Mentors program in 2001 when he was in sixth grade and only a few years older than Connor. He is now 25 and has come back to volunteer as a mentor himself.
Even their early experiences in the program are similar. The first mentor each was matched with didn’t work out. Sometimes relationships don’t click right away, or circumstances may change for the youngster or volunteer. The Talbot Mentors staff makes sure that they find the right individual for each child in the program.
Bowen’s relationship with his second mentor, Herb Andrew, has lasted more than a dozen years. Now married, with a three-year-old son and another child on the way, Bowen considers Andrew more than just a mentor. “Mr. Herbie is family now,” said Bowen, although he still calls him “Mr. Herbie.”
Bowen may be on his way to becoming Connor’s Mr. Herbie. The two hit it off right away the day they met, getting into a beanbag toss game at the Talbot Mentors activity center, where Bowen threw in some math practice, encouraging Connor to add up the scores. Connor’s mother, Becky, noticed the increased confidence already evident in her son’s voice as they played. “They’re going to have a lot of fun together,” she predicted.
Looking for a positive role model for her sons, she brought Connor to Talbot Mentors after his older brother had a mentor through the program. Connor would always tag along when his brother came by the office.
Bowen is looking forward to sharing his favorite outdoor activities with Connor. He still is embarrassed when people recall how he taught his own mentor how to fish, at a pond on Andrew’s farm. Mentors often insist that they learn as much from the kids as the kids learn from them.
As an adult, Bowen can appreciate the patience Andrew showed with him as he helped his mentor around the farm. “I once dumped a whole bag of soybean seeds, but Mr. Herbie didn’t get mad,” he said. “I see now that it took a lot longer for him to do things with me ‘helping,’ but it was fun for me.”
He hopes his example will encourage more younger volunteers to decide to become mentors. “I know time is tough,” says Bowen, who works as an Easton Utilities cable installer and technician. “But it only takes an hour or two each week. You can go fishing or to a movie or even have him help you change the oil in your car. The best thing for me was just being able to get out of the house.”
His experience growing up in the Talbot Mentors program gives Bowen a unique opportunity to pay back the time shared with him by Andrew, while paying forward his own time to another youngster who can use the adult friendship. “I had Mr. Herbie,” he said. “If it wasn’t for that, I wouldn’t be where I am now. I want to help at least one other.”
For more information, to make a contribution, or to volunteer as a mentor, call Talbot Mentors at 410-770-5999 or visit www.talbotmentors.org.
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