In the wee hours of Sunday morning, our flag was stolen. Most months of the year, we fly the American flag in front of our house, but in June, we choose to fly the Pride flag. We were not the only victims of flag theft on the other night. Several other homes and businesses in town who happen to believe that love is love also had flags or signs stolen. We all felt violated and we all were disappointed, even outraged. Why, after all this time, does hate still happen?
June is Pride month. Pride is self-affirmation. Pride is dignity. Pride is equality. There is nothing threatening or hateful in Pride. Nevertheless, some people still choose to hate or to shame or to marginalize gay people. That is wrong. That elevates brazen trespassing and petty theft to the level of a hate crime, and hate is always intolerable. Period.
We live in polarized times. Sadly, for some people, hate is still handed down from one generation to the next. If decency and democracy are to survive, then we need to do a better job of educating our children and eradicating the worn out stereotypes and stigmas associated with bias and hatred. As long as even a few people choose hatred and violence over love and empathy, none of us will be free to love whom we choose to love, or to live our lives free from fear.
I did not expect to be writing about this today. I wish I didn’t have to. A stolen flag is one thing, but because the theft and destruction of that particular flag—and many other similar flags in town, too—revealed something deeper and more toxic, I felt I had no choice. We’ll all get through this, but we’ll never be quite the same. That’s sad.I have always found Chestertown to be a welcoming and safe place. I believe it still is, but this early Sunday morning hate spree reveals a darker side. Fortunately, the Chestertown Police Department took these incidents seriously and acted swiftly: suspects have been identified, and arrest warrants have been issued. The perpetrators will be charged with multiple counts of trespassing, theft, destruction of property, and felony hate crimes. They will be tried, but whatever verdict is rendered, the story can’t end there. There is still a lot of work to be done.
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. knew all there is to know about hatred in this world. This is what he said: “Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.” Isn’t it time to embrace the light and to love one another? For that matter, is there really an alternative?
I’ll be right back.
Jamie Kirkpatrick is a writer and photographer who lives in Chestertown. His work has appeared in the Washington Post, the Baltimore Sun, the Philadelphia Inquirer, the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette, the Washington College Alumni Magazine, and American Cowboy Magazine.
His new novel, “The Tales of Bismuth; Dispatches from Palestine, 1945-1948” explores the origins of the Arab-Israeli conflict. It is available on Amazon.
Katherine Foster says
I am so sorry this has happened in Chestertown. I hope you will replace the Pride flag and fly it with love. I hope the perpetrators will come to know that hate does not win.
Suzanne Todd says
I’m glad the culprits were found. I guess you’ve heard about the hateful views and words of two Talbot County Council members. You’d think elected officials would be better than that. All this hate is depressing.
Suzanne Todd says
Oops, that’s the Easton Town Council. My sincere apologies!
Suzi Messick says
Such a profound meditation on the Violation. That occurred. Thank you
Rob Douglass says
Mr. Kirkpatrick,
Thank you for sharing your story with us.
I too, as a retired, 20+ year, active duty officer in the Navy, proudly fly my American flag, correctly per U.S. flag etiquette, 24/7, just as I flew it from my ship while in command, in every port we visited, and proudly from the bridge while underway. Being the proud father of a gay young man, we also chose to fly the original 1978, Gilbert Baker, 8-striped pride flag this month in St. Michaels for the first time, wondering if we would find it stolen, torn down, or if anyone would have the courage or ignorance to engage us negatively in discussion about its meaning or purpose. So far, thoughtful neighbors are sharing their positive approval, as I wonder if perhaps someone in their lives or families is also LGBTQ+, not by deviant choice as some might judge from afar, but by birth. Dr. King’s insights are so timeless, and so true, that it cost him his life, by those who would want to silence him and his message of love, light, tolerance, respect, equality, equity and dignity, for whoever you are, fully under the umbrella of “We the People,” having all the same rights as citizens. Light does overcome darkness and love does overcome hate, and we need to continue to call out hate where it resides, and those who want to spread it, act on it, or try to divide us as Americans and neighbors with hate or fear. I hope your flag is flying proudly again, and I hope the simple tolerance for others, and each of our right to live our lives in peace, and love who we choose, perseveres. Hope is not a strategy or a tactic I know, and I greatly appreciate your action of sharing your story, and motivating others to share theirs too. Sincerely.
Jamie Kirkpatrick says
Thank you for your thoughtful comments. A new Pride flag is coming soon and will fly again this month.
Bishop Joel Marcus Johnson says
Mr. Kirkpatrick’s letter is a keeper. Love, being “a many splendored thing,” is often kept like the candle of faith, hidden under the bushel. Worse yet, love has been offered as a cudgel against those whose affections can be kept only as a legal binding. Would that the heart could overcome the deeds of those who instead overcame those pride flags.