We are edging toward Thanksgiving. Carefully. Warily. What else can happen? What else can go wrong? More importantly, when do turkeys go on sale? Has the 2024 Beaujolais Nouveau been released yet? (Non! Beaujolais Nouveau Day is November 21st!) Apple pie, or pumpkin? What about Boston Cream? One of the young ‘uns has suggested a purple sweet potato pie. Really? Purple Sweet Potato Pie

I have made Mr. Sanders promise that we will stop at the very first Trader Joe’s we encounter on our 5-hour drive to the rental house where we will be celebrating Thanksgiving this year. I just watched a video of Hope Walz emptying holiday goodies from her TJ’s shopping bags. She had snagged three packages of the Trader Joe’s Dark Chocolate Peppermint Joe-Joes that I loved so much last year. I had FORGOTTEN about those divine cookies. Hope Walz on Tik Tok I just love holidays with food expectations. Now I feel up to the challenge of herding the cats and going away for Thanksgiving. Gobble, gobble indeed!

Some of my bravado comes from the notion that this year I have the ultimate pie crust recipe. It is uncomplicated, and almost as easy as passing off a store-bought pie as something I personally rolled out, fluted, crimped, washed with egg, and blind baked with professional finesse. You have to understand that my signature pie consists of a cumulus cloud of whipped cream resting on a delicious base of Jell-O chocolate pudding, in a darkly-satisfying, crunchy (store-bought ) chocolate cookie pie shell — just so you have a basis for comparison. I have just never been able to crimp a pie crust neatly, or even roll out a circle of pie dough. My mother’s major disappointment with me – that I knew about – was that I bought pie crusts. That I didn’t have the emotional backbone to learn how to roll out homemade dough. Well, this year, I will not be lurking in the pastry shell section of the frozen foods at the grocery store. I will be baking homemade pies.

This year I have stolen quite boldly from the New York Times’ test kitchens.

Shortcut Pie Crust
By Clare de Boer

INGREDIENTS
1 ½ cups/190 grams all-purpose flour
½ cup/60 grams confectioners’ sugar, passed through a sieve
¼ teaspoon kosher salt
9 tablespoons/130 grams cold unsalted butter, cut into cubes
2 large egg yolks

PREPARATION
Combine the flour, confectioners’ sugar and salt in the bowl of a food processor. Add the cubed butter and blitz until the flour mixture has a sandy texture with some pea-size butter bits.

Add the egg yolks and blitz then pulse just until the pastry begins to come together.
Tip the pastry out onto a rectangle of plastic wrap. Using your hands, form it into a 6-inch log. Wrap in plastic wrap and chill, at least 3 hours or up to 3 days, or wrap and freeze for up to 3 months. If using frozen dough, allow to soften slightly in the fridge for an hour before using.

Using the large holes on a box grater, grate 3/4 of the chilled pastry directly into your pie dish or tart pan. Working quickly by hand, press the grated pastry into the dish, starting with the sides then covering the bottom, grating more of the chilled pastry into the dish as needed to cover evenly. Pay attention to the seam between the sides and the base, making sure it is the same thickness as the rest of the pastry: The crust should form an even layer that is about 1/4-inch thick. (Save any leftover pastry for another use.) Chill, at least 30 minutes or up to 2 days. (This can be done ahead.)
The crust can take various routes from here; refer to whichever pie or tart recipe you’re using for guidance. If blind-baking this crust, it cooks best at 350°F.
NYT Shortcut Pie Crust

Our friends at Food52 understand that we need shortcuts, and crimping an attractive pie crust isn’t vital to the meaning of Thanksgiving. Food52 Apple Pie

They further understand that when you are ready for pumpkin pie you don’t care about the pie crust. Pumpkins are bold; a gingersnap pie crust enhances the pumpkin experience. Be prepared to have seconds. Food52 Pumpkin Pie

We had friends in Florida who celebrated family birthdays with pies instead of cakes. Be daring. Try some homemade apple pie. Or even a purple sweet potato pie.

“So learn about life. Cut yourself a big slice with the silver server, a big slice of pie.
Open your eyes. Let life happen.”
—Sylvia Plath

Jean Dixon Sanders has been a painter and graphic designer for the past thirty years. A graduate of Washington College, where she majored in fine art, Jean started her work in design with the Literary House lecture program. The illustrations she contributes to the Spies are done with watercolor, colored pencil and ink.

“Planning Ahead,” Jean Sanders

I read someplace on the internet that whoever scheduled Halloween, the clock change, and the presidential election all in the same week has some explaining to do. We have had too much of sugar highs, a dog who keeps waking up an hour earlier than the humans, and emotional swings that cannot be regulated by cheap white wine. And yesterday I ate the very last Halloween Snickers bar, so I am all out of sources of instant gratification.

I’ve decided instead to use the energy produced by my anxiety for good! We are looking forward to our mini family reunion at Thanksgiving with our children, their spouses, and two grandchildren at a rented lake house. Luke the wonder dog is coming along with us, just to add to the fun – I hope he doesn’t meet his match with the energetic 4-year-old.

Holiday cooking at rental houses can be fraught with complications because you never know what to bring, and how close the nearest grocery store is. I tend to over prepare and I bring it all: the KitchenAid stand mixer, the cookie sheets, the roasting pan, the rolling pin, the gravy separator, the electric knife, a few platters, rolls of aluminum foil, parchment paper and Saran Wrap for the leftovers, mayonnaise for the leftovers turkey sandwiches, candles, tablecloths, you name it, it will be packed in the back of the car along with Luke’s crate. A case of wine. Diet Coke. Half and half, heavy cream, oat milk, 2% milk. We never travel light.

I have been reading all manner of helpful holiday hints: what can we make ahead of time so we don’t need to cook every single menu item on the actual day of Thanksgiving. Without giving folks ptomaine poisoning. I need to formulate an actual meal plan instead relying on my normal tendency of just winging it – there will be the expectations of 7 other people to meet, after all. It makes sense to keep a list, and smugly tick off each dish as the preparations proceed.

Food & Wine says that we can make lots of the meal beforehand: stuffing, casseroles, all the veggies, gravy, turkey stock, desserts, and in theory, we could prepare the Brussels sprouts, though I think not. No Brussels sprouts for us! Give us green beans, but hold the mushroom soup. Note to self: remember to buy the cranberries this year. Last year we inadvertently went cranberry-free – but no one else noticed. I hope. Food & Wine

Food & Wine discourages making rolls, mashed potatoes or cornbread before the big day. But other food experts offer different opinions. The Pioneer Woman suggests that a huge time saver is making the potatoes ahead of time. Personally, I love peeling 5 pounds of potatoes in a strange kitchen, all by myself, every year, while the others are off enjoying child-oriented activities and photo ops while the meal clock ticks. Sorry Food & Wine, this year I am mashing the potatoes early. Pioneer Woman

The Food Network espouses their theory that the entire meal can be made ahead of time and then frozen. My deep-seated fear of food poisoning comes into play here – we have a 5-hour drive on the Tuesday before Thanksgiving. I imagine that our Yeti-adjacent cooler will not keep everything frozen rock hard and germ resistant, but maybe this would work for you. You can be fresh as a daisy on Thanksgiving, having done the yeoman’s work a couple of days ahead, and you can focus on passing hors d’oeuvres and watching touch football in the front yard. I envy your panache. Food Network And personally – if you ever freeze whipped cream instead of serving it fresh, right out of the mixing bowl, you should be ashamed of yourself. You might as well use Cool Whip on top of your pumpkin pie. Shocking!

What started me down this particular garden path was a 4-page recipe I found from America’s Test Kitchens for “Make Way Ahead Dinner Rolls”. I am always interested in irresistible carbs, which is why Thanksgiving is my favorite meal. I am sure that these dinner rolls are divinely tasty, warm and yeasty, dripping with good, salted Irish butter. Make-Way-Ahead Dinner Rolls But I know for a fact that the Pepperidge Farm dinner rolls that I will pick up Tuesday night at the Food Lion that is just 5 miles from our rental house are going to be delicious, too. Which will leave me plenty of leisure time for family photo ops and whipping the cream. Use your time wisely. Life is short. Gobble, gobble.

More from Ina Garten, who knows her way around a kitchen:Ina Garten Thanksgiving

“Never put off till tomorrow what may be done day after tomorrow just as well.”
― Mark Twain

I mind that it was 83°F yesterday. The Halloween Snickers bars got a little gooey, but at least the trick-or- treating children didn’t have to wear snow jackets over their Halloween costumes. They were full of giggles and energy, and they sported vivid green hair dye jobs and homemade costumes as they tripped merrily along the sidewalks of our neighborhood, stockpiling their goodies. Halloween came and went, as per the calendar. Which means that today, November 1, should be cool and autumnal: sweater and soup season.

Yes, indeed.

So I am going to stop my belly-aching and make some soup. We have a drawerful of vegetables, and a chicken carcass and an agenda. We will eat dinner tonight, and the leftovers will make a fine weekend lunch. Waste not, want not. My favorite chicken soup will fill the air in the house with the aroma of home. It can cure almost anything, including Election Day jitters.

Words to the wise: you are going to need chicken soup sooner or later this winter. And, no, it will never taste as good as your mother’s, or your abuelita’s, or anything from some mythical Lower East Side Jewish deli, with containers of chicken schmaltz on all the tables. And that’s OK. You are making new memories, (and dinner) and it is your homemade creation. It will ward off the flu, and you will feel talented and virtuous for boiling up a huge stockpot of your own soup! Maurice Sendak will hover behind you, proudly, as you measure out the rice. And soon you will be sipping your own chicken soup with rice.

Homemade Chicken Stock
1 deboned chicken carcass, including skin OR 1 whole chicken (you could even cheat and buy a rotisserie chicken!)
6 quarts water
6 garlic cloves, smashed
2 carrots, roughly chopped
3 celery stalks, roughly chopped
1 small onion, chopped
1 tablespoon butter
4 black peppercorns
1 bay leaf
Salt (optional!)
1.Use a large stock pot, and add butter and chicken over medium heat. Brown them a little bit.
2.Add all the rest of the ingredients, and bring to a boil.
3.Boil for 3 minutes, then turn heat down to low.
4.Cover, and simmer for about 3-4 hours, stirring every once in a while.
5.Once it’s a golden color, strain and let cool. Put in the refrigerator overnight, then skim the fat off the top.

Or, if you are pressed for time, Chicken Soup (not completely homemade – but you feel a cold coming on)
Olive oil
Half an onion, minced
2 carrots, finely diced
Bay leaf
A sprig of fresh thyme, or a few shakes of dried
2 quarts chicken stock (or canned broth – this is for the few of us who tossed out the chicken carcass early, never thinking of the soup possibilities. Shamefully, I have done this many times.)
1 cup uncooked, long grain rice (or, if you are a noodle family, have your wicked way with them)
2 cups shredded, cooked chicken

1.Heat the olive oil in the bottom of a large, heavy-bottomed skillet.
2.Add onion and carrot, and sauté till soft, 5-7 minutes.
3.Add bay leaf, thyme, and chicken broth, and bring to a boil.
4.Reduce to a simmer and add rice and chicken.
5.Let soup bubble, stirring occasionally, till rice is cooked through, about 15-20 minutes.

This will be much better than Lipton’s Chicken Noodle dried-powder and freeze-dried chicken bits. And certainly better than Campbell’s. Have you ever seen those pinkish chicken nubbins in the bottom of a Campbell’s can? Ick!

Soup is the most versatile of foods. It reminds us of the security of our childhoods, it stretches to feed unexpected company, it is easy to make and is always well received. It smells of holidays past. Make a batch of turkey soup after Thanksgiving, and in a single sniff you can relive the whole meal – without having to iron the tablecloth or to watch a single moment of football.

Don’t take my word for it: Food52 has hot and cold soup recipes. You can be ready with soup, whatever the weather: Food52 Soups

Remember to vote on Tuesday!

“There is nothing like soup. It is by nature eccentric: no two are ever alike, unless of course you get your soup in a can.”
—Laurie Colwin

The Spy Test Kitchens have been enjoying a breath of fresh fall air. We have flown the coop for a few days, so this is a column from our own Way Back Machine.

The days have been beautiful with bright azure skies, brisk zephyrs, and a touch of frost on the windshield in the morning. It is a good time for walks with Luke the wonder dog, who was heartily tired of the hot summer. The brown, fallen leaves make poking his nose in every bush an even more intriguing activity from his point of view, while more annoying to my end of the leash. I do enjoy trailing a curious, buoyant dog, happily trotting ahead of me, than the pokey puppy I was hauling around the neighborhood all summer long.

Luke is also fond of taking car rides. He likes going along on short excursions to the farm stand for various seasonal purchases. In the past few weeks we’ve taken trips to buy chrysanthemum plants for the front porch, pumpkins that we will never carve, and the most recent visit was to acquire more than enough apple cider to make a batch of apple cider doughnuts. There is nothing more tempting than a clutch of home-made doughnuts over a weekend. We have no steely resolve in this house as we prepare for our annual doughnut nosh.

At least we aren’t frying the doughnuts, so we can enjoy the first tastes of fall without worrying about fats and all of the cardiac dangers associated with fried foods. I love the silicone doughnut molds we have, which are bright Lego colors. These molds are doughnut-shaped so we don’t have the added temptation of orphan doughnut holes, sitting sadly on the kitchen counter, singing their alluring siren songs. I love the genius of reducing the cider on top of the stove to concentrate its flavor. This is why we like to read recipes, to wallow in the vast and varied experiences of the home cooks who have cooked before! These doughnuts taste like a visit to the farm stand, without all the car windows wide open to give Luke the cheap breezy thrills of a car ride to the country: Baked Apple Cider Donuts

If you do want the experience of frying doughnuts, à la Homer Price , please take a look at Mark Bittman’s recipe for fried apple cider doughnuts. I haven’t tried this recipe, but I bet it is deelish: Apple Cider Doughnuts

Apple cider doughnuts only require about a cup and a half of cider. Whatever should we do with the rest of the half gallon? We are concerned about food waste, and apple cider is so delicious! Naturally our thoughts first turn to cocktails: Apple Cider Smash

Spiked Hot Apple Cider Punch

And you can kill many trendy birds with this stone: Apple Cider Spritz

But life is not a big cocktail party, sadly. We do need to eat dinner and be civilized for the greater part of the day. This is an ingenious way to use up some cider, and do something different with sausage: Sausage and Apple pie

And here is a handy dandy list of recipes, for when you are tired of apple cider, but don’t want to waste a drop: Extra Cider Recipes

It is a good time for change. It’s nice to wear sweaters again. Socks! What a novelty! I even had to pull on gloves for this morning’s trot through the neighborhood. I know in January that a 46°F morning will seem balmy, but today I watched mist rising from the grass where the sun was burning off the dew, and it felt good to bundle up a little bit. It will be divine to sink our teeth into warm, sweet apple cider doughnuts, too. Welcome, fall!

“Two sounds of autumn are unmistakable…the hurrying rustle of crisp leaves blown along the street…by a gusty wind, and the gabble of a flock of migrating geese.”
― Hal Borland

Food Friday: Art by Jean Sanders

Go open your back door this morning and feel the cool air. It’s not quite sweater weather, although I did wear long sleeves walking Luke the wonder dog earlier. The breeze holds the promise of fall. As the sun rose today, wisps of fog wafted through the neighbor’s trees, and the mockingbirds were scolding louder than the blue jays. The wrens complained. The squirrelly boys lept fearlessly from the roof to the pliant arborvitae branches below. Our transition to fall has arrived.

Having cooler temperatures makes more things possible. It doesn’t seem onerous to have the oven chugging away baking potatoes at 450°F when it is cooler outside. It’s not like during the summer, when the oven seems to heat up the whole house. Although it would be more practical to have a compact, shoebox-sized toaster oven for potato baking – we just don’t have any space left for a toaster oven. Instead, our countertop is littered with a curated collection of olive oils, salt boxes, a pepper grinder, a bowl of fruit, Luke’s pills (he’s developed arthritis!), paper towels, dishwashing liquid, a vital Kleenex box (allergies abound in October) and the all-important coffee grinder and electric kettle. There is just no space for a toaster oven. Welcome to our cozy kitchen; warm and toasty from October to March.

Our dinner last night would never work for a typical family – meaning one with adults and school-age children. We had twice-baked potatoes and a salad; adding a protein seemed Herculean and unimaginable. We were glued to the iPad, watching the news about Hurricane Milton and the latest presidential campaign mic drop. Who had time to broil chops, or to roast a chicken? It was all we could do was to eat nice hot, steaming potatoes garnished with sour cream, grated cheddar cheese, bacon, left-over chili, dusted with Penzeys herbs, and green onions. Mr. Sanders added some healthy greeny broccolini and a handful of chopped tomatoes, because he is such a show off. He also made a side salad of cool Romaine and arugula, which was our nod to healthy eating. Plus we had a bowlful of baby carrots in lieu of fatty crunchy cocktail snacks as an appetizer. We ate our veggies, honest. Because there were fresh, home-baked chocolate chip cookies for dessert. Grown ups, yes, maintaining our priorities, thank you.

Poke around the fridge to be sure you have enough in the way of decorative and tasty garnishes for your potatoes. I had to excavate the freezer, digging through layers of frozen corn and ice cream sandwiches before I finally unearthed the chili from a couple of weeks ago.

Some folks like to rub potato skins with butter or olive oil before roasting. It is important to prick your potatoes to let the steam escape while they are cooking. I use a long cooking fork, and really spear the potatoes. Then I cheat a little, by popping the potatoes into the microwave for about 3 minutes on high for each potato. I also cook them singly, because I find the microwave math daunting. Then I pop them right in the preheated oven, on the oven rack, at 450°F for half an hour. Maybe I don’t need that toaster oven after all. I use Russet potatoes, because that’s what we had growing up, and I am sure Martha says so, too.

J. Kenji López-Alt, who does extensive and exhaustive recipe testing, recommends baking potatoes, preferably Russets, at 375°F for about an hour (the more moderate oven temperature produces a creamy, fluffy interior). Early on I had an art director who scoffed at such niceities. She believed in cooking things FAST. 450°F was her preferred temperature for a lot of foods. Never argue with your art director. And last night she was right, again. Thanks, Pat!

Baked potatoes with cheddar and bacon

Baked potato toppings

Nothing is as good as this, the perfect baked potato: with a knob of Irish butter, crunchy Maldon salt, and a pinch of freshly ground black pepper for a good, quick, hot and homey dinner on a cool night. Everything else you can add as a topping is just deelish window dressing.

“Wherever you come near the human race there’s layers and layers of nonsense. Look at that moon. Potato weather for sure.”
—Thornton Wilder

Jean Dixon Sanders has been a painter and graphic designer for thirty years. A graduate of Washington College, where she majored in fine art, Jean started her work in design with the Literary House lecture program. The illustrations she contributes to the Spies are done with watercolor, colored pencil and ink.

Like Milo, the little boy in The Phantom Tollbooth, I am often looking ahead, which diminishes the piquancy of the current moment. Milo wanted to know what would happen next, and what was around the corner. “Expectations is the place you must always go to before you get to where you’re going.”
― Norton Juster

I am looking forward to fall, because it is October, after all. I want to wear comfy sweaters, shuffle through leaf piles, and fling the windows open. I am looking forward to wearing socks, planting bulbs and buying pumpkins for Halloween. I was not ready when the November issue of Cook’s Illustrated magazine thumped into our mailbox. It’s only October – who needs to read about Top Turkey FAQs? Or The Best Cranberry Sauce is Relish? But the final straw was the Vive le Croquembouche! piece. Tempus fugit and all that – I cannot go from the lazy summer dinners of grilled burgers and barbequed chicken to full on Thanksgiving holiday prep. Should we brine, or salt the turkey? Cast iron cornbread dressing? How to reheat the leftovers…

October is all about resetting our internal clocks and adjusting expectations. Let’s take things step by step. Pass me that full-sized Snickers bar, I need to start practicing Halloween, and then we’ll start thinking about nice fall-ish, October meals. We’ll start by moving inside, and re-acquainting ourselves with the stove.

I’m pretty sure all my mother ever did with pork chops was lightly brown them in a Revereware frying pan then toss them into a Pyrex baking dish and let the oven take over. (She did not believe in exotic convenience foods like Shake N’Bake.) She included a side dish of homemade coleslaw and a bowl of cinnamon-y apple sauce. And now you see my stodgy New England side: no fuss, no muss, and a lot of colorless food. Surely we have advanced a little here in this very modern twenty-first century?

Food52 has a spicy, colorful paprika inspired pork chop recipe.

Mark Bittman, never one to fuss, has a sautéed pork chop recipe

Of course, Martha has a complicated variation on my mother’s applesauce pork chops by Martha https://www.marthastewart.com/341389/pork-chops-with-apple-raisin-relish

Bon Appétit has the answer for everyone – BA’s pork chop variations

The New York Times had this deelish variation that we cooked so I could paint a decent illustration (as well as eating a nice Sunday dinner): Skillet Pork Chops and Apples

I also made a batch of my mother’s cole slaw, so we were respecting tradition, as well as feeling hip and modern by tossing a little miso into the pork chop skillet. The apples were our seasonal gesture toward fall – even though it is sunny and 78° this morning as I type. Still, it is not in the 80s, and Luke the wonder dog is happily napping, resting up from his morning walk, while anticipating his afternoon stroll. Maybe we need to re-name him Milo.

Fall is coming. Don’t look ahead on the calendar. Don’t think about Thanksgiving just yet. Buy some apples and cider at the farm stand, and then a couple of pumpkins. The mums are radiating beams of color and light. The birds are coming back. And grab me another Snickers, please.

“When he was in school he longed to be out, and when he was out he longed to be in. On the way he thought about coming home, and coming home he thought about going. Wherever he was he wished he were somewhere else, and when he got there he wondered why he’d even bothered.”
― Norton Juster

It has been the longest, hottest summer on record! And it’s almost October. Although we are keeping an eye on the latest hurricane threat: stay safe, Florida!

As we try to walk our 10,000 steps every day, lingering under the shady trees as much as possible, Luke the wonder dog and I long to be home, in the coolth. Luke can at least lie on the floor, on top of the air conditioning vent. He also doesn’t have to worry about what to do with the sudden abundance of zucchini. Like Homer Price’s doughnuts, ripening zucchini is everywhere. Luckily, there are just about as many recipes for zucchini as there are the ubiquitous and magically regenerating vegetables themselves.
It’s that time of year. Again. Neighbors furtively slipping their excess zucchini harvest onto your front porch, before dashing back home. These are the times that try cooks’ souls: what to do with all the excess zucchini baggage.

Luckily it’s been a great tomato season, and they provide excellent camouflage for zucchini: Zucchini Tomato Gratin

What are we to do with all the zucchini? It doesn’t look very nice on the windowsill – the end-of-summer tomatoes in varying stages of turning from green to red are much more attractive. An elegant galette is a good way to start your purge. The crust is easy and forgiving, and it is soothing to lay out all the zucchini rings in ever widening circles. You will look very competent and trustworthy. And then you can start to spring these other surprises on the unsuspecting. If you have a garden, you have been harvesting tomatoes with a greedy heart, thinking about the jars of spaghetti sauce you will enjoy this winter. But what about that ever-rising green mountain of zucchini? You need to put on your thinking cap, and find some creative culinary solutions. Zucchini Ricotta Galette

Zucchini boat recipes are popular. I like the idea of filling hollowed out vessels of zucchini with a variety of fixings, vegetarian or not, and using up all the lingering leftovers. Zucchini Boats

Luckily, zucchini is oh, so versatile. You can find it in soups, salad, chips, galettes, casseroles, hidden in breads and cookies. You can roast it, slice it, twirl it. This is a link to a virtual compendium of Zucchini Recipes.

Do not be sneaky with zucchini. You don’t want to be the formerly favorite aunt who brings zucchini ginger cupcakes to the birthday party. Kids have a different perspective on summer. They never forget so-called “gourmet” baking experiments, or deliberate kid deceptions. Zucchini Ginger Muffins Yummy icing is always welcomed.

Nobody is fooled by zucchini bread. Least of all the small children into whom you are trying to stuff healthy vegetables. They are wise to your ways. Discuss the benefits of adding vegetables to your daily diet before feeding them this delicious Lemon Zucchini Bread. We are very excited about this Chocolate Zucchini Bread.

“The trouble is, you cannot grow just one zucchini. Minutes after you plant a single seed, hundreds of zucchini will barge out of the ground and sprawl around the garden, menacing the other vegetables. At night, you will be able to hear the ground quake as more and more zucchinis erupt.”*
-Dave Barry

*This is my favorite zucchini quotation of all time, and I haul it out almost every year.

Last weekend Mr. Sanders and I stole some time away from Luke the wonder dog. We plied him with a red rubber Kong stuffed with a huge gobbet of peanut butter. We scampered out of the house to pile into the car which was packed to capacity. No, we weren’t sneaking out for an impromptu vacation or to a swanky club for the newest in artfully curated cocktails. No. It was a Saturday, and we were driving to the dump, with a load of broken pecan branches and fragrant grass cuttings. The dump is where we went on our significant 40th wedding anniversary, an occasion which we documented with a rare selfie.

Our drive to the dump is short. We leave the leafy neighborhood to travel past the packed Target parking lot, past the commuity college, onto a highway where we can gauge the seasons by the passing trees: bare, leafy, or blooming copses of crape myrtles, and rows of tall, blue-green pine trees that bend and wave in the wind. Off the highway, under some towering power lines, we see fields whose crops change seasonally: collards, tobacco, sunflowers, beans, and corn.

Then we see a couple of vine-covered, tumble-down brick buildings in what must have been a tiny town center – or more accurately, a crossroads, which, since we didn’t grow up here, has an air of mystery for us. Why were these buildings abandoned? Who lived there? Do moody introspective high school students come out here to take pictures for their yearbook portraits? I hope it isn’t Japanese knotweed cozying up to those buildings. Maybe it’s just Virginia creeper or kudzu. We never consider the more prosaic reasons of death, or taxes, as reasons why the buildings stand empty when we drive by. The abandoned hamlet is the stuff of Nancy Drew, or Stephen King, to our passing fancies.

The dump isn’t a vast cinematic wasteland, with piles of abandoned cars and hills of discarded soda cans guarded by snarling dogs. It is an about an acre plot with a paved fenced-in area, run by a staff of earnest, plump, boiler-suited men. There are about a dozen open shipping containers; all are battered and rusting, labeled CARDBOARD, YARD WASTE, METAL, MIXED PAPER with other corners in the yard designated for HAZARDOUS WASTE, HOUSEHOLD ITEMS, and ELECTRONICS. We deposit our branches, and grass, and the paper yard waste bags appropriately, and within minutes we are on our way again. This time we are extending our adventure, and testing Luke’s bonhomie, and are going to take a joyride ride to a popular farmstand.

White’s is a crowd-pleasing Instagram presence, which accounts for its packed parking lot whenever we visit. Besides their seasonal flowers and produce, in true entreprenurial fashion, they also sell ice cream and have a massive play area for children – it is quite the happening place. All they lack is a signature artisanal cocktail.

This sunny September weekend the display tables, and a large field, are crammed with potted chrysanthemum plants. White, yellow, pink, purple, red, and orange plants are packed onto all the long wooden tables, and dozens of people are loading up their little red wagons with mums, pumpkins and tomatoes. We are no different: we snatch up 3 HUGE yellow mums, 2 reasonably-sized slicer tomatoes for end-of-the-summer sandwiches, and one small festive pumpkin for the kitchen table.

I will not mention pumpkin spices again until Thanksgiving, which is the only decent time of year to invoke those words, à la Beetlejuice. We will not be preparing pumpkins for human consuption just yet. And when we do, we will be delighted to re-discover that pumpkins are not just for Halloween decorations and Thanksgiving pie. But not yet. It will be time soon enough to expand our repertoires and use some of our local produce with seasonal gusto. Right now we need to enjoy the transition from the tediously long and blazingly hot summer to the relative coolth of September, when we can catch our breaths and await the arrival of Halloween. And eat tomato sandwiches.

We buzzed home to Luke, who seemingly napped while we were out. He never missed us, and he did not appreciate our beautiful mums and pumpkin trophies. He did enjoy eating a juicy red tomato wedge. Luke likes some farmstand finds. And Luke believes in shopping local, and taking your dog to the farmers’ market. Good dog, Luke!

“Pleased to meet you, I’m sure,” he observed as he sniffed round our ankles. “Excuse the noise, won’t you, but I have my job to do. Got to be careful who we let in, you know. But it’s a dull life and I’m really quite pleased to see a visitor. Dogs of your own, I fancy?”
― Agatha Christie

Tailgating season has begun, and the Spy Test Kitchens have been busy testing and tasting, planning and plotting, shopping and schlepping. It is a wonderful time of year, with the changing seasons, exciting sporting events, and all sorts of socializing which still feels like a huge relief after the COVID years. (But be sure to get your boosters and your flu shot – you don’t want to get sick and miss the big game.)

Some folks go to great lengths to have an Instagram-worthy tailgate event. Think Martha. Think color coordination. Think branding. I’d rather focus on some delicious food to share with friends. You’ll have to decide if you will prepare your foods in advance, or if you will be cooking on site. It’s tricky to pack all that grilling equipment, but experienced season ticket holders have personal systems for packing the car with all their food, grill, ice, cups, corn hole board and dog bowls. I admire their organizational skills.

The week before a tailgate I have Post Its sticking up everywhere, reminding me what I need to bring: cups, table cloth, paper towels, Wet Wipes, Off, plastic ware, plates, nibbles, buns, beer, fizzy water, Cokes, cupcakes, a pop-up tent, chairs, blankets, picnic basket, raincoats… It is an endless, ever-changing list.

Here is a more definitive check list of tailgate necessities:
Ice – in a cooler (which doubles as extra seating)
Folding table & camping chairs
Tablecloth (if you have a long table, consider using a fitted sheet)
Grill and lighter fluid (check the rules – be sure you can have an open flame)
Matches
Grilling utensils
Paper plates
Plastic utensils and cups
Napkins
Wipes and paper towels
Bottle opener and koozies
Trash bags
Beverages and mixers
Condiments
Water

Our Luke the wonder dog is always up for an outdoor adventure. He tried to figure out how to chase after a frisbee at a University of Florida tailgate, but he is more adept at, and much prefers, chasing his favorite ball, so I have to be remember to pack his Chuckit ball and launcher. And his bed – Luke is 14, and likes his canine comfort.

I try to keep the food simple, and make sandwiches ahead of time. Luke still dreams about the giant 8 ounce bacon burger he had at his Florida game. But we were all younger then, and foolish, and thought nothing about calories and heart health. Now is the time (for us humans, at any rate) to modify our behavior. One of my faves is a French ham and butter sandwich on a fresh baguette: baguette, ham, and lotsa good butter. What more could you need?

Perhaps a Pan Bagnat. I substitute chicken in mine, not being a huge tuna fan.
Pan Bagnat

We have even been known to stop by the grocery store deli counter to pick up a few ready made sandwiches before a game. So easy, so deelish. Food prepared by other people always seems to taste better. More tailgating sandwich ideas: Tailgate Sandwiches

Martha always has wonderful presentation, but Martha also has a staff of ambitious and talented Martha Wannabees. I do not have the stamina for a fully thematic tailgate. I might bake some football-themed cupcakes, but that is where my cleverness end. My energy wanes, and truly, my ideas for tailgate foods are the sorts of things we prepared for little boy birthday parties, not this sort of grand bon vivant gesture: Martha’s Game Day Recipes

I will pack up a warm platter of pigs-in-blankets and stuff it into a thermal bag, so they are still warm-ish as we socialize. Fresh, warm, soft pretzels are always gobbled up. Apples, veggie platters, charcuterie boards, barbecued chicken, cookies and Doritos go with us to the game, but very few ever come home again. The playful outdoor atmosphere leads to healthy appetites at a tailgate: Rule of Thumb – always bring more than you think you will need. And don’t forget your tickets to the game!

Garden & Gun’s Tailgating How Tos

Southern Living’s Tailgating Ideas

“I think baking cookies is equal to Queen Victoria running an empire. There’s no difference in how seriously you take the job, how seriously you approach your whole life.”
—Martha Stewart