As I nattered on about last week, Luke, the wonder dog, and I have been walking past the Episcopal Church’s pumpkin patch all month. He likes sizing up the snackability of the squirrels, and I enjoy walking through the rustling yellow ginkgo leaves, watching the children and their parents trying on pumpkins for size, heft, and personality. Choosing the best pumpkin for the front porch is almost as serious a task as picking out a Christmas tree.
First of all, a pumpkin needs to have a good stem. It needs to be both a handle, and the top of your pumpkin’s head, for heaven’s sake. The pumpkin needs to display a little charisma of its own before you start carving away, with warm, sticky pumpkin flesh as your own personal Carrera. Do you want a tall Jack O’Lantern, or something cosy and squat? Are you going to be all Martha-y with an elaborate stippling, shellacking, Origami-ing and many, many steps? Or will you wing it? Will you yield to your inner Halloween muse?
I don’t think my children remember the years that I used a power jigsaw to carve their pumpkins. Instead, I hope they remember the couple of years that we gathered up their playgroup pals, and assembled on the lawn of a friend’s riverfront house. All the adults excavated a few plastic pumpkin carving tools from kitchen junk drawers and we cobbled together enough improvised instruments for a dozen children to hack, saw, sculpt, cleave and whittle pumpkins: spoons, plastic knives,tongue depressors, straws, toothpicks, nail files, shish kabob skewers, screw drivers, lobster mallets. We were a creative bunch. The mothers controlled the steak knives, and no one got hurt. Not even Mikey, who had massive criminal potential even then.
The results were always mixed, and there were always tears. But on the grass, in the breeze, with everyone feeling the cool, ropey slime from the pumpkin seed membranes drying on their skin in unlikely places, it was a genuine childhood experience. I bet when you cut into a pumpkin this weekend, you will smell the damp goo, and will be transported for just a moment by your own childhood time machine.
The steps to carving the pumpkin will come flying back to you. You’ll remember that you should cut the lid at a little angle, with a notch, so you can pop it back into place easily. You’ll recall that you should scape the seeds off the sides with a big spoon, before you try to pull that entire jellyfish mess out. Your inner seven-year old will wonder how anyone could possibly eat one of these. Whose idea was it? Why carve triangles for eyes? Do we have any candles?
Jack O’Lanterns, sadly, do not last much beyond the first night of candle burning. The candles burn and scorch the lids so they never fit correctly again. And then there is the stink of burning pumpkin! Ewwww. If the weather warms up, your carefully incised demonic grin is sure to collapse. And then there are the raccoons and squirrels to consider! Luke is available if you need a good pumpkin-eating-squirrel watch dog.
Go forth and carve. I always found that jig-saw blades were excellent and flexible tools for pumpkins. Unlike steak knives. Just don’t add any electricity. Keep an eye out for bad-seed Mikey. Something wicked this way comes!
https://food52.com/blog/8665-how-to-make-roasted-pumpkin-seeds-without-a-recipe
https://www.myrecipes.com/recipe/our-easiest-pumpkin-pie-ever
This is a great seasonal recipe, so why wait for Christmas? This will be a tasty fall menu item. Thanks, Mrs Larkin. https://food52.com/recipes/8141-pumpkin-christmas-bread
And to further your cool factor without the danger and mess of pumpkin carving – here is a link to making your own glow in the dark slime! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Waz4HIBPd7A
“Halloween shadows played upon the walls of the houses. In the sky the Halloween moon raced in and out of the clouds. The Halloween wind was blowing, not a blasting of wind but a right-sized swelling, falling, and gushing of wind. It was a lovely and exciting night, exactly the kind of night Halloween should be.”
― Eleanor Estes
Write a Letter to the Editor on this Article
We encourage readers to offer their point of view on this article by submitting the following form. Editing is sometimes necessary and is done at the discretion of the editorial staff.