Naming Names by Angela Rieck

My nieces and nephews are starting to have children now, and some of the names that they choose for are unusual.

Naming a child is a big responsibility. Today vintage names, (e.g., Hazel, Ajax, Lillian) are popular. Some new parents are making creative choices as well. Certainly, Hollywood has been an inspiration for this trend with names like Apple, Moon Unit, and Pilot Inspektor.

When I named my daughter, I wanted to include a story in her name. I also wanted to name her after my mother. It was the least that I could do after what I put my mother through during adolescence.

But my husband did not like my mother’s name and it was against Jewish custom to name someone after someone who is living. (They might be right since my mother died unexpectedly five months after my daughter’s birth.) As a compromise, we took a relatively uncommon name and added a middle name, which embedded my mother’s name. We thought it was rather clever, but my daughter hasn’t been a fan. I asked her as an adult what she thinks about her name. She said that while she doesn’t appreciate the spelling, it is a part of her.

While Jews typically use names to honor people who have passed; Christians have no difficulties naming children Jr., III, etc. after living relatives.

African American names have even more variety. In addition to European and Creole names, in the 1970’s it became common to combine names adding prefixes (e.g., La), suffixes (e.g., isha) and sometimes punctuation. But these children can suffer as my daughter has, by constantly having to spell their names. On one of my teams, I had three Kenishas, all with different spellings.

In America, it requires a legal proceeding to change your name. The Chinese people, on the other hand, have no such constraints and typically have several names over their lifetime. They have the names given them at birth, (called Ming), names that they take at adulthood (called Zi), and names they give themselves (Hao). Those who travel or live in the West often add a Western name if their name is too difficult for English speaking people.

So, yes, in America, it is a big decision. But it is one of the hundreds of parenting decisions that my nieces and nephews will second guess over the years. My advice, “buckle up.”

Angela Rieck, a Caroline County native, received her PhD in Mathematical Psychology from the University of Maryland and worked as a scientist at Bell Labs, and other high-tech companies in New Jersey before retiring as a corporate executive. Angela and her dogs divide their time between St Michaels and Key West Florida. Her daughter lives and works in New York City.